I was always envious of her. She had been born female while I had been denied the birthright...
My Niece's Talent
By Jerrie526
Part 1
Author's note: The majority of this story is fiction but the first parts of it are true. My niece Ashley was a joy to me in those innocent days before puberty and the teen years. I love her highly. She gave me permission to write her into this story because it was the only way that this plotline would work. The parts that happen before her puberty are real and autobiographical to me. I did go through these things with her and truth is sometimes harder to write than fiction. Believe the first parts but enjoy the rest.
I would like to thank Aardvark (Doug B) for the superb job of editing he has done for me.
* * *
My niece, Ashley, was born a beautiful and rare child. She was always happy growing up and when she was still a baby, everyone would say what a little angel she was. It was true; she was an angel, and more, as we learned later.
Being transsexual, I was always envious of her. She had been born female while I had been denied the birthright. I couldn't deny my hatred for natural females for having the right genetics while I looked like my father and my brother, yet I loved them, too. I just deeply wished that I were one of them.
Ashley and I got along well as she grew up. Her mother, Stephanie was the youngest child in my family while I was the second oldest, seven years older than she. We'd always had a close relationship that bordered on sisterhood, but my maleness ensured that we would never become quite that familiar. As I grew older and more depressed over my desire to become female, I reached my breaking point and started the process to correct my birth defect.
Ashley thought my changes were the neatest things she had ever seen and loved being around me. We'd go shopping whenever her mother would let us be together. I lived 500 miles from them, so it was a rare treat for me to see her, and whenever I did, I doted on her like a loving parent.
One day, we were on our way to a department store to do some shopping when Ashley looked up at me with the most innocent look on her face, "Aunt Jerrie, while I'm with you today, can I call you Mommy? You're so much nicer than my mommy can be at times." All the while, those big innocent eyes looked at me, shining for all they were worth. To me, it was priceless.
Trying to hide my tears, I told her that she could call me that anytime she wanted. I was happier that day than I had ever been. I had always wanted to have kids, but I wanted to be the mother, not the father. That day, I found out what it was to be a mommy to a beautiful nine year-old child. That day, we did everything together and I loved every moment of it.
Time halts for no one. I finally received my final letter of approval and had my surgery after two years of transition. I was content with myself for the first time in my life, although I hated my voice - especially after a careless surgeon doing a tracheal shave damaged it. My dream life became hell for me because I couldn't talk without sounding like I had a throat full of gravel.
The love for my niece grew even more when the innocent ten year-old told me that she would talk to the doctor and make him fix my voice. I cried and gave her the biggest hug of her life. The love of a child to a parent or proto-parent was all rewarding. I eventually found a doctor to try to repair my voice, but it was only partially successful; the gravel was gone, but the damage was done. I would never have a woman's voice.
As Ashley approached puberty, her life took a change. One day, on her way home from school, she walked past a construction site. As she reached a break in the wall protecting pedestrians from harm, a backhoe broke into an unknown hazardous chemical dump. It ruptured and mixed several containers, sending out a cloud of gas just ten feet away from her. The air currents were just right to protect the operator, but it hit her fully, enveloping her body and she breathed it in. Frightened and hurting from her first menses, she stood there, not knowing what to do. The construction workers hustled her off to a holding area, and called her mother.
Eventually, an ambulance whisked her away to a local hospital where she was isolated and had her skin scrubbed clean, nearly abrading the upper three epidermal layers. She was then taken to an isolation room, where she was examined closely.
Investigators were already at the scene of the accident, trying to determine what the chemicals were and where they came from, but things didn't look good. From the rust and deterioration, the barrels had been there for at least forty years.
Stephanie called me that night after I had gotten home from work. I immediately called my boss and requested several days off. I left town in a hurry. I had a long drive ahead of me that night, but I didn't care.
The drive seemed to take forever. It was all interstate, but the 500 miles still took eight hours. My system buzzed with no-doze and I was exhausted when barking dogs greeted me at my parents' house. My parents calmed them, and I went upstairs, sacked out and didn't awaken until my body recovered about 11:30 that morning.
When I rose, I read a note. Everyone was already at the hospital with my niece. After a quick meal, I climbed back in my car and hurried all the way.
Once in the hospital, I found her. My parents and my sister greeted me outside the isolation room. There, in the pane of glass in the bed, was my niece. She looked miserable and medical staff in rubber enviro-suits surrounded her.
I asked Stephanie, "Will they permit you to go into the room with Ashley?"
She looked at me with tears in her eyes and shook her head. "They don't know what she was exposed to and they won't let anyone in the room without the protective gear on. I want to go in there, but I get claustrophobic in the suit. I tried last night, but I couldn't do it."
"I understand sis, but someone has to be with her. Do you think they'd let me go in there?" I had to ask. I couldn't stand to see my niece so alone. I looked into the room, feeling nearly helpless.
As I stared at Ashley, I noticed some very strange things about her. She had been ruthlessly scrubbed yesterday with some heavy-duty brushes, from what I had been told on the phone, yet her skin looked like it hadn't been touched. There were no raw patches and it was a healthy glowing pink, although it seemed to be completely covered in an oily sheen. I watched as a nurse took a gauze pad and wiped her arm off. The oil soon re-covered the area she just wiped.
I looked back at my sister and asked her, "What's that oil covering Ashley?”
"They don't know. It coming from her skin, but they have no idea what's causing it.”
I went to one of the nurses that had come out of the room and asked her if there was any chance of going into the room to be with Ashley.
She looked on sympathetically. "I don't think there would be a problem with that, hon. I'll verify it with the doctor." She turned back to the room and spoke briefly with a man in there. She returned quickly. “You can go inside, but you have to wear the enviro-suit for your protection.”
I agreed and after I donned the suit I went inside. My niece looked so forlorn lying there while people worked over her. When she saw me, her eyes lit up, but not for long. When I tried to touch her, she cringed away from my touch. I could tell that it was because of the suit.
The doctor finally arrived and I confronted him immediately. “Doctor, is there any way I can take the suit off?” I asked anxiously. “My niece needs real human contact.”
He shook his head abruptly. “I'm afraid that's out of the question. It would be far too dangerous for you.”
I didn't like his attitude. He didn't know it was dangerous; he was just guessing, or, more likely, heading off a lawsuit. I glared at him. “Doctor, I could very easily have my niece taken somewhere else where they would see her less as a guinea pig and more like a child!”
He frowned and looked up to me, possibly annoyed at potentially losing an article in the American Journal of Medicine. “Very well. You may see your niece without the suit, but only if you sign a waiver absolving the hospital of all responsibility.”
That was fine with me and as I entered the room again, sans the suit, my niece's face lit up like the heavens. “Aunt Jerrie!” she exclaimed and held her arms out for me. I obliged by giving her the biggest hug of her life.
When my skin touched hers I started; I felt burning, not bad, and it only lasted a minute or so. When we finished hugging, she lay back down, tired but happier.
She looked exhausted, but it was more the kind of weariness brought on by having to deal with people who cared more for her novel illness then her.
I noticed the fair amount of oil on my skin from the hug, and watched as my skin appeared to absorb it, or maybe it just evaporated quickly, but it didn't vanish from her skin – the places I had rubbed it off had already been replenished with the stuff.
After what I thought was a few hours of just being with her and holding her hand, my stomach rumbled in desire. I glanced at my watch and realized that I'd been there for eight hours.
I touched her hair. “Honey, I'm going to get something to eat.”
She rolled her head towards me. “Aunt Jerrie, will you be back?”
I was more tired than I thought. I faded from fatigue as I stood by her side. “I may not be back until tomorrow morning, but I'll be back as soon as I can.”
She offered me her arms again. I hugged her, a little worried about the burning I'd felt before, but nothing happened.
She smiled. “Good night, Aunt Jerrie, I'll see you soon.”
Chapter 2: Changes in the making
After I left the hospital that night, I went home exhausted. I still couldn't get over her heartless treatment at the hospital. For 'our' protection, they said. I snorted. They didn't know what sort of chemicals she was exposed to and it would be a while before they would know too.
I was sick with the doctors and a little with my own family. Her mother had looked on in revulsion at the oily substance on her daughter's skin. My own sister wouldn't go anywhere near her daughter without the rubber enviro-suit.
My decision to go hold my niece was made from a near maternal instinct. I saw a child hurting from having her skin scrubbed nearly off by heartless and cold people who said they wanted to help her. Stiff bristle brushes and chemicals on the tender skin of a child were what I would call helping or cleaning.
The way I felt on the way home told me that something was going on. I remembered the oil burning my skin. I needed to wash myself and try to get rid of whatever was making me nauseous. I hated the idea of returning to the hospital sick to see the doctor smile in smug self-satisfaction.
However, even after a long hot shower and severe scrubbing, I felt the same. I wondered if I might have breathed some fumes, or if the oil really was making me sick. I felt tired, so I lay down on the bed. I was out of it as soon as my head hit the pillow.
* * * Morning came with the quickness felt only by one who was too tired when she went to bed. When I awoke, I felt immensely better. I couldn't remember any time in the previous 15 years waking up so refreshed and energetic; it was almost like I had lost that many years. I had been dealing with a cold for several weeks, but now, I didn't feel like I had a cold at all. I was clear-headed and even very hungry.
My morning ritual completed, I was rinsing my face off in the bathroom sink when something caught my eye. The grainy look of my face was gone and it seemed to be a bit lighter. Six hundred hours had left small scars through my beard area and now, it looked like I had never had it done.
Shaking it off as a figment of my imagination, I continued to get ready. I didn't want to leave my niece to the predations of her doctors too long. I knew already that I was going to be her biggest supporter in her recovery. I ate quickly and went to get dressed. As I put on a pair of jeans, I noticed that they were a bit looser. Thinking that my diet was finally starting to work for me, I paid it no mind and finished dressing.
My trip to the hospital was quick and I was let in to see my niece when I arrived. She looked to be doing better, but there was discomfort on her face. Concerned, I sat down by her side.
"What's wrong, sweetie?" I asked her.
"Nothing much, Aunt Jerrie. I'm still having cramps and my tummy feels horrible," she replied.
"Is it that stuff from yesterday that's making you feel bad?" If it were, I would get the doctors to take a closer look inside to see if there was anything that could show on a test.
"No, Aunt Jerrie. Mommy says that I can't talk about it, but I can tell you anything. I got my first period the day before yesterday when I was walking home, right about the time that stuff got on me. I've never felt anything so bad in my life. Mommy says that I have to get used to it, but I don't want to. It hurts too much and I don't like seeing blood come out of me like that." She had a stream of tears rolling from her eyes. My heart went out to her. She not only had been exposed to some sort of chemical, she had had her first period.
I took her in my arms again and held her tight. I didn't experience the burning like I had yesterday, so I wondered if it hadn't been a fluke that it happened, or perhaps that I had been too tired from my trip and things were out of sorts with me. She still had a light sheen of the oil on her skin, but not like it had been the day before.
"Sweetie, I'm going to go out and talk to the doctor. Would you be a good girl and try to sleep a little? I know you have to be tired and it also helps when you are feeling like you are. If I can, I'll be back as fast as I can. If you are sleeping, I will just sit in the chair over by the window until you wake up. Is that ok with you?"
"Sure, Aunt Jerrie. If you talk to Mommy, tell her I want my teddy cat. I couldn't sleep last night because I didn't have her." She looked hopeful that she would have her toy when she went to sleep tonight.
"Sure, honey. I'll tell her, or I will go to your house and get it myself. How about that?"
"Would you? I'd love that." If I did something for her, she would feel that it was that much more special.
"Sure, sweetie. You try to relax and I'll be back before you know it," I told her reassuringly.
She was really tired because she leaned back in the bed, closed her eyes and was very soon asleep. I held her hand for a while before I got up and worked my way out of the room. The main doctor on her case met me and I could tell he wanted to talk to me.
"Ms. Martin, I'm sure that you are aware that we might not be able to find out what those chemicals were that came in contact with your niece, although we are trying hard. I need to ask you a few questions about yesterday's hug."
I didn't really like the way he had said that, but I played along. "Sure, Doc. What do you need to know?"
"When you gave your niece the hug, you stiffened slightly, as if you were burned or shocked by something. I initially wrote it off as revulsion to the oily substance, but I began to wonder if that was all it was. You might be aware that we're trying to identify what the oil is, and we are making progress. We've been able to identify two common body hormones as well as certain endorphins that the body needs to heal itself. Other substances are probably, in part, the chemicals that contacted her skin."
"So, if you know what the main parts are, what does that have to do with me? I mean, sure, I came in contact with the oil and yes, I was repulsed by it since it really felt nasty on my skin. You know I won't do anything to your hospital because I signed the waiver."
"I know that,” he said impatiently, “but you have to be aware that if anything adverse happens to you, you'll wind up in the isolation room yourself. Now, since yesterday, we've been able to determine that the substances in the oil might be a mutagen. We..."
I cocked my head slightly. "Wait, what do you mean by mutagen? That it will cause a person to mutate into some sort of monster? That my niece is going to turn into a monster?"
"Now, don't go getting ahead of yourself and thinking bad science fiction here. All we can determine is that something about your niece is changing. We scrubbed her skin hard, unfortunately, to try to get the chemicals off of her before it could damage her. We scrubbed her skin raw and yet, now, there's no sign of any skin damage at all - it pretty much healed itself overnight. The oil is probably going to be an ongoing thing that will most likely run itself out, but only time will tell."
"Still, what does this have to do with me?" I asked.
"We aren't sure, but I have to get your word that if you notice anything strange or unusual that you contact us immediately. Did you notice anything at all so far, something that's not normal with you?"
"Well, to be honest, I was really tired last night, and when I went to bed, I fell asleep quicker than normal, but that could have been the stress of the day. This morning, I got up feeling like a whole new person. It was almost like I had lost 15 years. But I think that's because I slept so soundly last night."
"How are you feeling now?"
"I'm feeling great. As a matter of fact, I haven't felt this good in quite a long time."
"Hmm, ok. Well, as I said, if you have any problems whatsoever, please get in touch with us and we will see what we can find. Thank you for your time." He shook my hand and then departed.
I thought about what he said as I walked to my car and on the way to my sister's house. Stephanie was not at home, but I knew where she kept her spare key. I let myself in and got Ashley's 'teddy cat.' I couldn't figure out why this child had such a thing about this old hideous toy. It had been so ugly that it was cute when I had bought it for her after she was born. I guess it might be because I bought it for her.
As I got ready to leave, I started having some rather horrible stomach cramps and I had to make my way to the bathroom. Before I could sit down, my stomach revolted and I wound up spewing into the throne. It seemed that everything I had ate that morning was back up. I finished that and wound up evacuating the other end in what seemed to be the most powerful diarrhea I had ever had the displeasure of having. My bowels and stomach continued to gurgle for some time before it subsided. I felt weak and sweaty as well as slightly chilled. I guessed that when I got back to the hospital, I would have to go talk to the doctor.
I decided that it would be best that I go back to the house and rest for a bit. I might have been having an allergic reaction to the oil I'd contacted yesterday but I had never had an allergy in my life. But with this, you could never tell.
Even after a three-hour nap, I was still feeling out of sorts. I had to put on my game face regardless of how I felt. I could not let Ashley know that I was not feeling well. Another trip to the bathroom emptied my system out again. Nothing looked normal in the remnants and I started to feel a bit nervous. As I pulled my pants back up, I noticed that they were markedly looser on me. My shirt was even loose on me. I must have been really getting sick if my clothes no longer fit me. My shoes were loose, or my feet had shrunk. That, I did not think was possible. I tied the laces a bit tighter and left to go back to the hospital.
Life went on for everyone except me. Since I was on personal leave time, I had the leisure to come and go as I wished. No one else from my family was at the hospital and Ashley was looking rather forlorn without anyone around her, but she perked up when she saw me. Her grin got even bigger when she saw her teddy cat. I went in the room and sat down next to her bed and handed it to her. She was in sheer bliss now that she had her old friend with her.
I had figured that she would be feeling too sick to notice that I was not feeling well myself, but I was surprised to see her back to her chipper self again. I caught her appraising me before she piped up.
"Aunt Jerrie, you look funny. Did you go buy clothes that are too big for you?" she asked me innocently.
"No, sweetie, I brought these clothes with me when I came up here. I'm just not feeling that well and I think I'm coming down with the flu or something." I had to stretch the truth a bit for her sake.
"But, Aunt Jerrie, if you are sick, you should see the doctor. They are really good. They fixed me up all better and I know they could you, too." Without a word to me, she picked up the call button on her bed and pressed it. "See, I even called them for you. Now you can get all better!"
The Nurse came running into the room with a panicked look on her face. She took in the sight of Ashley sitting there on her bed with a beautiful smile on her face. Then she looked at me and blanched. She left the room again, but was back in a minute with the doctor as well as the rest of the team.
They pulled me off to the side and hammered me with questions. Most of them came too fast for me to answer, but the doctor caught the gist of what was going on. I had blood drawn and sent to the lab. I was starting to show an oily sheen to my skin and my nervousness increased. In the middle of the testing and questions, my vomiting came back in full force and it was all I could do to keep it off anyone. I did manage to splatter a lot of shoes, but at least it wasn't people.
The hazard suits came out again and I was taken on a gurney to another isolation room where they continued to work on me feverishly. I lost consciousness sometime in there and I knew nothing more.
Chapter 3: It seems a new life is needed
As I reentered the land of the living, I wondered if anyone got the license number of the truck that hit me. My whole body hurt and my head pounded with a thousand variations of the anvil chorus, not to mention the ringing of the bells of a thousand churches.
I opened my eyes, but they refused to focus for me. I heard voices that sounded close by. I tried to call out, but all I did was grunt. The voices stopped talking and I saw a colorful blur come closer to my face. I tried to follow the blur with my eyes and suddenly, I heard someone shouting for a doctor an dthen the patter of running feet.
I saw a bright flash in my eyes after feeling my eyelids pulled back. I guess my reaction was sufficient because the light went out.
"Ms. Martin, can you hear me?" a male voice asked me.
"Yes." I said, or at least tried to. The grunt was again the only thing that came out of my throat.
"Sorry about that. If you can hear me, just nod your head." I nodded yes. "Good. You had us very worried. We thought we were going to lose you for a while. You have been in a coma for the last month."
A coma? What was wrong with me?
The speaker figured that I might have a few questions. "Somehow, the oil on your niece's skin caused a drastic reaction with your body. We found out that it was a mutagen, and it changed you in totally unexpected ways."
"WHAT!" I tried to yell out, but my mouth wouldn't open enough. When I did get it open a bit, I felt the clinginess of medical tape over my mouth.
"Wait a minute, let me get the breathing tube out of your throat." He gently pulled the tape off my mouth and, ever so lightly, pulled something out of my mouth. I felt it moving in my throat and I wanted to gag and then it was over. "Now, try not to get too vocal. You've had the tube in your throat for a month now and your vocal chords will be disused to talking. Now, you were saying?"
My voice came out weakly, "I was trying to say, what do you mean, changed? Am I a monster now? What about my niece? How is she doing?" I didn't like the sound of my voice – it was all gravelly and a tiny squeak.
"You needn't worry about your niece. She was released from the hospital two weeks ago with a clean bill of health. She's been by your side most of the time she could since then. You're not a monster, far from it, but I don't think you'll be going back to your job anytime soon. Now, would you like to see how much you have changed?"
"Doc, I can't see very well right now. I can't focus and everything is a blur.” I tried moving my hands, but they were strapped down. "Could you release my hands at least?"
"Not right at the moment. If you get up, what you cannot see might hurt you. It would be best if you wait until your vision returns. Your body has been through a lot. Rest and take it easy. Good night." I felt a warm sensation in my arm and I went out like a light.
* * *
When I finally woke up, I could see clearly again. Only this time, it clear and sharp, so sharp I doubted that I'd need the glasses that I'd been wearing since the fourth grade. There was a nurse standing just outside the room and others bustling down the hall on various errands.
Knowing that I could get their attention anytime I wanted I just lay there, stunned, thinking about what the doctor had said last night. Or was it last night? I had no idea what time of day or even what day it was. I had many questions that needed answers.
"Nurse?” I called. “Excuse me, but could you get the doctor for me please?" The gravel was gone, but it sounded like I was talking with lungs full of helium.
The nurse by the door looked in at me and smiled brightly. "What was that, sweetie?" she asked.
'Sweetie? When did I become a *sweetie*?' I thought.
"I was just asking if I could see the doctor. I have some things that I have to ask him." I told her again.
"Sure. He told me you woke up again last night. You sure had us all worried last month," she said with a concerned smile on her face. "I'll have him paged and he will be here as soon as he can get here. He's still off shift at the moment."
"That's fine. Could you untie my arms? I'm hungry and I'll need them to eat."
"The doctor left word that you weren't to be untied until he was sure you weren't going to hurt yourself. You will just have to be patient and things will work out. If you like, I will feed you." There was a sly smile on her face, as if she was telling an inside joke.
"Sure, I guess the hospital has rules about invalid patients.” I felt odd about her feeding me like a small child who couldn't feed herself.
She brought in a meal a few minutes later and sat it on the bed table. She took the lids off and I caught a whiff of the aroma of the food. My mouth started salivating at the scent. I was really hungry. I hadn't been able to smell anything like food for a number of years and I had forgotten that food could smell so wonderful.
Needless to say, the food was absolutely fantastic. My sense of taste was so much better now that I could smell things again. I wanted to cry over the wonder of it all. Whatever it was that I had come in contact with had done a miracle. Things that had been lost were now back: taste, smell, and vision. I wondered what else was improved.
At last, I the fine meal even though it really was nothing more than cream of wheat, toast and a poached egg with milk. As the nurse was wiping my face off, the doctor strolled into the room.
"Well, Ms. Martin, you certainly look chipper this morning. How are things with you?"
"Fine, Doctor. I can see clearly this morning and that is a surprise. I haven't seen clearly since I was ten. I really enjoyed breakfast this morning. I'd forgotten what it was like to smell or taste food. And I feel like I could run a marathon and win it."
"Well, I don't think you will be running a marathon anytime soon. You still have some recovery time and then we will see." There was that sly smile on his face, the same one that the nurse had earlier.
"Ok, Doc, now that we have the niceties over with, let's cut to the chase. What happened to me?"
"Before I get started, there are some people waiting to see you." He turned to the door and signaled. My parents walked in a second later. I was happy to see them. But they both hung back as if they were scared of me.
"Now, I know your background and it was quite an interesting read, let me assure you. Your niece was exposed to chemicals from an old chemical plant from another state. They had been dumping their waste products on that site during the 40's and 50's, when the area was nothing but open wasteland. Once the city started getting closer, they stopped and dumped elsewhere. It seems that they were experimenting with a way to make livestock production more productive using male and female hormones as well as mutagens, but they were unsuccessful.
“Normally, these chemicals, separately, would have effect on a human, but the peculiar combination that got your niece was enhanced by her onset of menses. With her hormone productivity being the highest it would ever be in her life, the chemicals reacted with severe modifications to her body. Nothing really visible except a speeded up healing process and the oil. Her body couldn't handle the chemicals very well expelled the worst out her pores like sweat. She is still producing the oil and from what we have been able to determine, she might be producing it for the rest of her life."
"That's all fine and dandy, but what does that have to do with me?" I wished that he would get to his point.
"I'm getting to that. When you came in contact with the oil, you came in contact with the mutagens. But you wouldn't have had any reaction if you hadn't also been a genetic male and had a high level of female hormones in your body. You see, the chemical company had been using female hormones to fatten up the steers and had designed the mutagens to become more receptive to the female hormones – to enhance the effect of the hormones. But they stopped when they started getting sex mutations.”
He grinned. “I see that you're getting the gist of what I am saying. Yes, the steers were becoming females. It made them female, but not genetically female and without a uterus. But when you came in contact with the oil, it started mutating your body to become female. Not the restructured male one you had, but a real genetic female. You had something that the steers didn't have: you had your niece."
"I don't understand Doc. What difference would that make? I wouldn't be able to grow a uterus either."
He held up his hand gently, a calming gesture. "Let me finish. Your niece was also expelling some of her DNA into the oil. When the mutagens mixed with your body, you changed completely. Now, I don't want to scare you, but you actually got part of your niece's genetics and you grew a uterus."
My heart leapt into my throat. I had a uterus??? How I wished I had one for so many years, and a leap of fate gave me one!! I grew more excited by the minute.
The doctor continued. "Now, I know this is shocking news to you already, but there are other things that you have to know. Ms. Martin, could you hand me that mirror on the dresser next to you. Yes, that's it. Thank you." He turned back to me. "I'm going to show you something that might freak you out." He held the mirror up so that I could see my face.
HOLY SHIT!!!!!!! Looking back at me was the near twin of my niece! Her face was now mine. How much more did I have? I turned my head in all directions trying to catch the full view. I had him tilt it down a bit so that I could see the lower part of my body. No breasts on my chest, but I could see small nipples trying to poke out of the hospital gown. Blankets covered the rest.
"Doctor, could you please release my hands now? I have to see them. Please?" I pleaded with him.
Silently, he released my hands; I brought them up before my face and stared at them intently. The tiny things at the end of my arms were not the hands I had grown up with.
"Ok, Doc, answer me this: Why am I so small and what happened to my breasts? I had implants and they should still be there."
"It seems that your body shed any and all useless material. We had a hard time keeping up with the stuff your body expelled. Physically, you are now an eleven year-old girl. As for your implants, your body expelled them too."
"But, but how can that happen? They were under the muscles on my chest and should not have come out!" I exclaimed.
"One morning, the nurse came in to change your gown and when she removed it, there were two silicone bags of saline with it, but no wounds in your skin. We figure that they were pushed out of your muscles and skin and then the wounds healed themselves up. There is no other explanation for it."
I took all this in and was silent for quite a while. I had finally gotten my wish, but I wasn't sure if it was what I really wanted. I was 37 years old and now, suddenly, I looked like an eleven year-old girl. I would have given my eyeteeth to look like an eleven year-old girl WHEN I was eleven years old. Not now! What was that going to do with my life? I certainly couldn't go back to work as I was. No one would believe me. I wasn't even sure that my parents would accept me. It had been hard enough for them to accept me as their transsexual daughter. They felt like they had failed me and were terrible parents when I had my SRS. Nothing I could ever say would let them think of me other than as their oldest son. They looked at me as if I were a stranger - they wouldn't even come closer than the edge of the door. My father had always been a strong man, but he looked like a frightened little boy. Mom just looked on curiously.
"Mom, Dad, please talk to me. You're both staring at me as if I had the plague. Believe me, it's not catching."
Both of them looked at me with surprise; I thought that neither of them had expected me to say anything to them at all.
My father spoke first after a long pause. "What do you want us to say?” he replied in agitation. “You were the one who insisted on going in the room and taking off the protective suit. You got what you wanted when you had SRS and now this! You can't be our daughter – you're young enough to be our granddaughter, not to mention looking like our granddaughter.” He sighed heavily. “I'm too old to raise another child. What the hell do you want us to do?"
"I have an idea, but it won't be my decision to make. I'll have to get back with you on that." I was just relieved that he hadn't rejected me; he had had such a hard time with my SRS. I turned to mom.
"Mom, I know you and dad have never agreed with my decision to have surgery. I know I was unreasonable to demand to hold Ashley, but no one could have expected what happened! I'm still the same person inside this little body that you gave birth to so many years ago."
It took a long time before she said anything. "I've never really agreed with your reasons for having your surgery, but I've always felt that I could have accepted it in time.” She shook her head helplessly. “But now, I'm not sure what to do. I sat up here day after day while you were in your coma. When I saw how much you were changing, I prayed that God would let you die rather than face life as a monster. Instead, you became a little girl.
“Your father and I had always hoped that you would eventually come to your senses and go back to being our son. Now, that's no longer an option and I don't know what to do. I'm sure that in time, I can come to accept it, but it will be hard, harder than anything else I've done. It's a lot to take in." She stood off to the side and went silent.
I sat back, thankful that I still had both parents – albeit barely.
My parents made their leave and it was just the doctor and I again. The whole time I'd been talking to my parents, the doctor had been sitting there quietly taking things in.
"I already had an idea what your parents were going to say, but I couldn't say anything to you about it. There is a possible solution." He signaled at the door and my sister and Ashley came in. Ashley literally bounced with excitement. "Ms. Martin, your sister has an offer. Please hear her out before you decide.”
I felt that I knew what she was going to say and wanted to turn her down, but when my sister began, I listened.
"Jerrie, I know you have had a rough life. Mom and dad didn't reject you, exactly, but I you have nowhere to go. Ashley wants me to adopt you as her twin sister. You really are a near genetic match for her. You're my sister by surgery, so I'm not sure how I could handle raising you as a daughter, but you really aren't in an ideal position to justify living on your own. You couldn't survive without a parent since at eleven. Ashley is lonely for a sibling and you wouldn't have to worry about anything. You'd have to go back to school again until you could resume whatever career you wanted. All you have to do is let me know what you want, and I'll go with that."
I was dumbfounded with her offer. I thought it was more Ashley's idea than her own, but my sister had come through – she wouldn't turn me away. Ashley wanted so much to say something, I could tell. I asked the doctor and Stephanie to step out of the room for a bit while I talked to Ashley.
"Why do you want me to be your sister, Ashley?"
"Oh, Aunt Jerrie, I feel so bad that this happened, but you can't go back to what you were. You look so much like me now that it's like you were my twin sister. Oh, please, won't you say that you will be my sister? Pretty please?"
My feelings were all over the place. It would literally be like starting over. Everything I had done and accomplished in my past life, some things I had been proud of, would be thrown away. Starting elementary school as a girl, living as a girl with my sister as my mother? Still, there was no real doubt. Maybe I could have come to some compromise arrangement where I could bend the legal system and live as some freakishly smart girl with adult rights, but Ashley looked at me with those big blue eyes so pleadingly, and she could always twist me around her little finger. To grow up again with her, sharing everything as I could have never have done as Aunt Jerrie...
I reached way down and touched her hand, now the same size as mine, from my hospital bed. "Ok, sweetie, I will be your twin sister. Can you go get mommy and the doctor so that I can talk with them?"
She gave a happy squeal and bounded out the door to get her mother and the doctor. All three of them came back in the room, but Ashley was the most excited.
"Ashley tells us that you have agreed to the conditions. Is there anything that you feel we need to?" The doctor asked me.
Ever since I was very young, I had always felt that I should have been a little girl and now I had the chance. I wasn't sure that I could act like a child or how things would look if I acted too mature. I thought that the portrayal of a much younger person might be very difficult. Childhood had been a long time ago. But one thing was for sure, I could act like a child and no one would think it odd.
"There might be issues, Doctor, that will have to be addressed before things settle down. I need to find out what has been passed on to my employer and insurance company. If everything is to go well, I have to know what they've been told."
He looked thoughtful. "Well, about the only thing that they have been told so far is that you were exposed to a hazardous chemical and that you were in a coma. They haven't been told about your physical changes, although they know about the mutagens. I think I know what you want to do, and it might be unethical, but it might be wise to go that route anyway."
My sister looked on, puzzled. "What are you two talking about? I don't understand this talk of 'ethics.'"
"If I'm going to become your daughter, your sister has to die. The doctor could sign my death certificate that says I died of complications resulting from exposure to hazardous chemicals. I'm pretty sure that the insurance company is going to want to see an autopsy report and that will be the only thing that may prove to be a problem. We'd need a certificate of cremation or something like that. Then we need a paper trail about an unknown girl who was sick from pneumonia or something was brought to the hospital and it was discovered that she was the identical twin of your daughter who disappeared after you gave birth to them both.
The doctor back then did say you gave birth to twins, but one was born dead. How the body disappeared is still an unknown, but I know you were not in the best of condition after Ashley was born and anything could have happened. This scenario might be the best for us all. You are the beneficiary of my life insurance policy and you would be able to support both of us until I am able to graduate school again and decide on a new career. A new birth certificate will have to be provided for me as well as a new name. Hmm, Doc, how are my finger prints now in comparison to my past ones?"
"We looked at them once you were stabilized and they had changed. They are not copies of Ashley's prints but there are enough similarities that it would be a plausible situation. Stephanie, is what she said about your daughter's twin true?" Stephanie nodded that is was true. "It would be perfect for this. I think it could be pulled off and the records concerning Jerrie would have to be altered to reflect her death. I know it's fraud, but we have to come to terms with this. We can show that she died and, per request from your parents, her remains were cremated. I am sure that we can scrape up enough cremated remains from various crematoriums to give the semblance of someone's remains. Let me do some checking with the administration people and see what they say. You may have to give me a few days to talk things through. I'll go now and get the ball rolling." He quickly left us alone.
I had some thoughts I had to pass by Stephanie. "Sis, I know what dad feels. If this if this is going to work, you are going to have to make sure mom and dad go along with it. And does the rest of the family know about me?"
Stephanie looked thoughtful for a moment. "We only told them that you were in a coma after being exposed the chemicals Ashley was. Nobody knows that you changed except for Ashley, myself, mom, dad, and the hospital staff."
"Good. Are you going to sue the construction company?"
"We've already reached a tentative settlement with them about Ashley. It wasn't big; they admitted no guilt over it because it wasn't their chemicals. You can't sue anyone for your change. You signed those forms, remember?"
I sighed at that part. It didn't really matter. I had a lot more important things to think about, like my new life.
End Part 1
TG transformation chemical SF age regression rated-M
Read Part 1. 2.
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