Sam I Am :: BigCloset Classic :: BigCloset TG Stories <br /> June 2001 to November 2004

I am Sam...

Sam
I Am

by Sherilynne Amber MacDonald

The Diary

Page 128

I found this diary in her room so I thought I'd try to write down some of the stuff that has happened to me. No one's going to read it 'cause I write backward and besides, there's a lock on the book and I've got it hid behind some boxes in the closet. 'Cept when I'm writing in it, like now.

She wrote some stuff on the first few pages, I couldn't read it at first but I held it up to a mirror and then I could but it is really lame-o. Like how she thinks these boys like her and how much she hates this boy or girl and stuff like that. Puke. I guess she lost interest, or maybe she just lost the book 'cause she hid it really good and I only just found it, but there's nothing dated for like three months before she died.

Now it's my book.

Page 127

I couldn't think of anything else to write then and I just noticed I didn't date it like I guess you're supposed to in a diary so I don't think I'll date any of them. I'm not too sure of the date anyway. I'm just writing this down for myself. So I won't think I'm so crazy, maybe.

Also, I just noticed that I started my writing on like the last page and I'm going backward through the book, so maybe I am crazy. It doesn't look backwards to me but I figured out the backwards numbers at the top of the pages and they run backwards.

I don't know how this happened. It doesn't make any sense and I've given up trying to tell people about it. I tried to tell some of the nurses in the hospital but they didn't think I was talking about anything real and they kept giving me shots. I wasn't hurting that much. My heart hurt some when I realized my folks were probably dead but that was later. That still hurts. Sheri's folks try to be nice but they aren't my folks

Nobody knows I can write backward. I didn't know at first either. They think I got brain damage. Maybe I do. Maybe I'm just a pigment of Sheri's imagination, like in a story. God, that's making me cry.

Page 126

I write just about as sappy as Sheri did, don't I? Maybe it's because I'm using her brain? I guess I'm using her brain. I got a theery about that. I found out some things about her since I got out of the hospital. Nobody knows what she was doing when they found her and took her to the hospital. She shouldn't have been in that part of town and her clothes were torn and dirty.

She'd been at a party and she disappeared. I think she took some drugs and she did some bad things then she got hurt and she died. And just then I must have died, too. Only, for me it was my body that died and for her it was her mind. So, here I am, using her brain and her body.

Page 125

Anybody that reads that is going to think I'm crazy. Sometimes, even I think so.

The last I remember, there was a lot of noise and light and it hurt real bad and then I woke up. I didn't know where I was but I still kinda hurt some. My eyes wouldn't open right away and I made a noise. Someone goes, "She's awake."

Who's she, I thought.

Someone said real close to me, "Sheri, honey? Are you awake? It's Mommy."

"Mommy?" I said, or I tried to say but it came out like I had a mouthful of something. I opened my eyes and this beautiful blonde lady with the brightest blue eyes was looking me right in the face.

"Sheri? You're awake?" She's like really worried sounding.

I shook my head and that hurt a lot. I tried to tell her my name but just then I couldn't think of it and it was difficult to talk anyway. She didn't understand me. She wouldn't have understood me if she had understood me. You know what I mean. Or, at least, I know what I mean and I'm the only one that is going to read this.

Page 124

They treat me real nice but they keep calling me Sheri. I'm beginning to answer to the name cause I realized that I am Sheri. At least I'm living in her body. They kept me in the hospital for a few more days, I had a broken arm, I thought it was my right arm but they said it was my left arm. Sheri's left arm. But see, I know I'm left-handed. But Sheri isn't so I can use her left hand, I mean, her right hand as if it were my left hand and that's good.

In the hospital, I had to go to theraby everyday, it was head theraby. They wanted to find out what happened to me but I didn't know. I didn't know what happened to Sheri either.

At first I tried to tell them I wasn't Sheri but they just kept telling me that I was and they would only stop when I started crying. So I started saying, okay, I'm Sheri but I still don't know what happened. I got the feeling there was things they knew had happened they didn't want to tell me about.

Page 123
It's better now that I'm out of the hospital and Mommy took me home, Sheri's mom to Sheri's home. But it's better, I only have to go to head theraby once a week.

Except. Everything is backwards. And worse than that, I'm a girl.

I don't think I was a girl before. But now, I look in a mirror and I see Sheri. She's a very pretty girl but I don't see me. Only, I'm not sure what I looked like.

Sheri is blonde with bright blue eyes, just like her mom. And she's fifteen. I think I was nine. Maybe only eight. Now I've got little boobies on my chest and a girl's thing down there. It's so weird.

Page 122

Sure better nobody read this!

Pages from Sam's diary will appear probably weekly unless I end up writing a lot faster than I expect to. :) -- Erin

Note: TG magic transmigration age progression child to teen rated-M
Part 4. 3. 2. 1.