Posted by: Admin on Thursday, July 25, 2002 - 12:11 AM 
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Heaven and Hell
Balancing Act - Part 2
by Maggie Finson
"Nice kid you got there," Sylvanna offered after the intros, and Lor had rather gently moved Vicki to a more private spot to begin her orientation in magic.
"Compared to what?" I shot back, still rubbing out sore spots that 'nice kid' had caused. "An enraged Malachite?"
"You and Lor did good." my own mentor in fighting techniques and friend chuckled. "But we have another job that needs doing now, if you'll recall."
"Baal." Letting out a long, very put upon sigh that my companion completely ignored, I looked up at her grinning face expecting to see the usual rough humor there. "And what it is that one is up to."
"That's Lord Baal to the likes of us, sweetie," Syl quietly answered with a serious expression. "He was a god once, and just happens to be one of the major Princes of Hell now. Be very careful about how you use that one's name even in passing."
"All right, I see your point," with an aplogetic grin, I finished, "just chalk it up to the trauma of giving birth to a very active child recently."
No problem, little sister," the usual grin back on her face, Syl handed me a rather large file folder and some computer disks. "Read through these, then go to Lillith's offices at The Gates and use one of her computers to access the disks. There's a lot of information there, and we don't have much time to assimilate all of it. Lord Lucifer believes that Lord Baal is going to make some kind of move very soon. We have to at least have a rough idea of what our esteemed War Leader is aiming for initially."
Giving the heavy paper file folder a wry glance, then the box of disks, I shook my head, waved a hand, and produced a new model PC complete with scanner, printer, and zip drive. "I guess I'd better get started then, huh?"
"I keep forgetting you can do that kind of thing," Syl stared at the computer setup, then at me, then at the paper files being scanned already as we stood there. "Just get it done quickly, so you can brief the rest of us going on the inspection tour."
Already deep within the files and reading with a speed that I would have found both amazing and impossible as a Human her last words dawned on me several seconds after she had left. "Inspection Tour? The rest of us?"
"Home." I informed a gathering of selected Hell Maids, some of the older or more important Succubae, Lillith, MAMA's constant presence, and no one else. This meeting was heavily shielded from either eavesdroping or scrying, and to call it tense would be like calling World War II a little messy. "Lord Baal is aiming for Us. Right here. If he can either take us out, or better in his view, subjugate us, Lord Lucifer loses enough of his power base to be forced into making a lot of concessions, or even surrendering rule of Hell."
"Can you prove that?" Lillith questioned quietly, but seething inside. Trust me, when a Prince or Princess of Hell is seething, everything around them knows it.
"Not to the satisfaction of an Infernal Tribunal," I answered slowly. "But look at it this way. The Lillim, and to a large extent these days, the Hell maids, are based right here in Home. Now, to top that off, He is going to have a new type demon embodying the best of both in Hell's Valkyries. Let me tell you, Lord Baal is very bent out of shape over that. In the past, any attempted coup has been thwarted by one of the two groups, or a combination of both, and with the addition of that third group, Lord Lucifer's power base will be increased to an almost unassailable strength.. Lord Baal knows very well that to take over in Hell, he has to take us out of the picture, or have us on His side in the conflict."
"That makes sense," Lillith nodded thoughtfully. "But we need real, concrete proof of this before I can take it to Lord Lucifer or Infernal Affairs."
"I'd avoid Infernal Affairs if we could," I replied, handing out a few sheets with briefly outlined connections to everyone. "Lord Baal has a pipeline to them, and may even have some very highly placed Demons there in His pocket. Going to them until we can find out who is who would be sounding an alarm that we know what He's up to. Which wouldn't stop it, just make him a bit more careful about setting things up."
"So now what do we do?" Lorilei questioned in concern.
"We get ourselves ready for a fight," I answered carefully. "And hope this isn't a feint by Lord Baal to divert attention from somewhere else. We also give Lord Lucifer a discrete warning of coming trouble, then go ahead with the inspection tour He ordered."
"Along with passing him all the information you've put together here," Lillith nodded with a vicious little smile. (Trust me, you want to see something predatory, have a look at Mother Lillith when she scents a hunt worthy of Her personal attention. Whoever it was that originally said 'the female is the deadliest of the species' must have had Mother Littlith in mind when he or she came up with the saying.)
"I"LL HAVE THE ARSENAL READY" MAMA told us. "IF THAT IDIOT BAAL THINKS I'M GOING TO LET THAT HAPPEN WITHOUT SOMEONE GETTING HURT, HE HAD BETTER GIVE HIS THOUGHT PROCESSES A VERY CAREFUL GOING OVER."
Lillith accepted that pronouncement without so much as a raised eyebrow at MAMA both calling Baal an idiot and the lack of honorific voiced by the keeper of Home. "Good. I'll get this information to Lord Lucifer, the rest of you pass quiet warnings to everyone else. Then get that damned Inspection going."
"I think I can help with that," I offered, feeling verymuch out of my depth with all the powerful beings involved in this already.
"I'm listening," Lillith gave me a long, inquisitive look.
"I can pass for a Hell Maid, but..."
"You're a magic user of no little power." Mother Lillith finished with a slow smile. "Which skill includes masking and invisibility spells. True?"
"Exactly." my answer wasn't quite as enthusiastic as it could have been, but come on. I was offering to put my own precious head right in the proverbial lion's mouth, then crawl in after it. Would you have been overly enthusiastic at a prospect like that? Didn't think so. "While Syl and the rest distract Lord Baal's minions with the inspection, I can be sneaking around doing a more in depth study of His setup."
"Do that." Simple as that. I'd made a committment and Mother Lillilth was not only holding me to it, she had commanded that it be done. But she softened the steel in her voice when she finished. "Just make sure you get back in one piece, daughter. I've grown somewhat attached to you in recent times and would be most distraught if something bad was to happen to you."
"I'll be careful, Mother," I promised fervently. I may be in Hell, and one of the Damned, but let's face it here; I was alive, breathing (sort of) and really wanted to keep that state of affairs as it was.
"Do that Daughter."
Wonderful. Another order. Only that one, I was more than willing to comply with.
I was preparing for my next adventure (or misadventure, call it what you like.) when a bedraggled, limping Victoria wearily trudged up to where I was. She was dragging a rather nasty looking double bladed hand axe along with what looked to be a very familiar argument with a so-called inanimate object.
"I see you've started your physical training." Wincing internally at the memory of what I had gone through during my own, I gave the axe an appreciative looking over. (Magic weapons, especially the ones with egos and minds of their own are very vain and just gobble up praise.) "Nice axe. What's her name?"
"Angel's Grief," Victoria returned tiredly. "And she says she's glad to meet you."
"The pleasure is mine, Angel's Grief," I replied with a small grin. "You take care of my baby, now."
"She says she will," Victoria passed on, then flopped to the ground beside me. "Arrgh! I think Brekke is hunting for bones she hasn't managed to break yet."
"Been there, done that, dear. I thought Syl was really trying to kill me while she was training me."
"Well I'm, sure Brekke is trying to do that with me." the second Hell's Valkyrie in all creation grumped. "with a wooden sword, yet. Tommorow she's going to use the real thing she tells me. I can't wait."
"You're making progress, then." I assured her.
"Right, instead of just bruising, I'll be able to bleed."
"Trust me, Vicki, that's progress."
"Huh!" Victoria groused. "I wish you wouldn't call me that."
"What should I call, you dear?" I questioned in a reasonable tone that reminded me of how Lorilei had aanswered me when I complained. "Would you prefer Victoria? That's kind of formal considering our relationship, isn't it?"
"Call me whatever you like, mama," Victoria shrugged, then winced as she obviously regretted that set of motions. "You're going to anyway."
"True enough,"
"But do you think you might be able to call me Vic for at least a while?" she pleaded. "This female thing is still hard for me to deal with. My damned tits get in the way all the time when I'm trying to do anything!"
"Victoria," I responded a bit severely. "this female thing is something that you're going to have to deal with for the rest of your existence, so calling you Vic would probably be counter productive, don't you think? And as for the your tits getting in the way, adjust your sense of balance to include them, it's easy enough to do once you think about it for a while. Then don't think about it and you'll find that it just comes naturally after a while."
"I'll try that." giving me a dubious look, Vicki thought about what I'd told her, then brightened. "Hey! That just might work."
"It will," I promised. "I've been there, and had to do it myself. I was a Human male for centuries, sweetie, so if I managed to adjust, you should be able to do it. Also, don't forget the Succubus trick of self healing, that is a big plus."
"Self healing..." with a sigh, all the bruises on her lovely body vanished in an instant. "Now how could I forget something like that?"
"Not to worry, Lor had to point it out to me, too."
"Hey you two!" as if summoned, the little Succubus bounced up to us. "It's time for some more practice with your spells, Vicki."
"Oh, great," Victoria grumped. "I just finish up with my daily dose of physical abuse and its time for the mental variety."
"Head on over to the training circle, dear." Lorilei ordered with a grin. "I'll be there in a minute."
"All right, mommy," Vicki sighed, getting up and heading for the enclosed, and very safe, area where neophites where trained in the use of the magics that were inherent in both Succubai and Valks.
"How's she doing with magics?"
"Good, really well, actually," Lor grinned, then chuckled. "She's mastered the healing spell, I see."
"Self defense," I snorted. "That was the first one I recalled and mastered, too."
"No, you used the self cleaning spell first, if I recall."
"Whatever," with a wave at the pile of equipment spread around me, I shrugged. "I alway did hate being dirty. But have other things on my mind just now."
"Be careful, hon," Lor gave me a serious hug. (When a full blown Succubus gives you a serious hug, believe it, you know you've been hugged. And blessed, or cursed, depending on your point of view. Me I took it as blessed.)
"I plan on that, Lor." with a grimace I began gathering up all that stuff and squeezing it into a rather smallish backpack.
"A TOW, and an Uzi?" she questioned as I packed those two items with enough ammunition to finish a decent war.
"Why take chances?" I stuffed about a gross of grenades and a pile of satchel charges into the pack while answering. "If things go bad, I want to leave as much confusion behind as I possibly can. Mainly so I can get away."
"Gehenna is a war zone, anyway," Lor commented as I shoved a heavy machine gun into the pack. "How could anyone add confusion to that?"
"Hit the headquarters." was my simple answer.
'No wonder Syl and the other Hell Maids like you," Lor laughed. "You're a girl after their own hearts."
"Hey, if I can't slice and dice it, beat it up, or blast it with a spell, I'll be more than happy to shoot it, or blow the shit out of it with explosives. I just wish I could get a few nukes for this trip."
"You know," Lorilei replied slowly, "the idea of you being in possession of even a small tactical nuke makes my skin crawl?"
"Girl can dream, can't she?" I grinned evilly.
"I made a monster, and I'm not talking about Victoria." Lor sighed, then laughed. "You just come back in one piece, okay? I'm finally starting to get used to having you around, and would be really pissed if someone took you away from me. Got that?"
"I worry about you, too. Thanks."
Syl met me at the Portal with about six other Hell Maids, all laden with an eclectic assortment of armaments ranging from a simple (looking) dagger that had a comfortingly evil glow all the way up to a 100mm mortar with several cases of rounds. All seven of them gave me long, gimlet looks as I easily sauntered up to where they were gathered and checking their ordance for the last time before our departure.
"What?" I questioned, checking to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything - like my clothes. "I'm not that late. I had to soothe my poor abused child before I could leave. Got a problem with that?"
"No," Syl shrugged, then gave me and my backpack a dubious look. "Where's all that other stuff you were supposed to bring?"
"In my pack," I innocently responded, then took another moment to observe all the goodies the others were struggling to load on themselves. I proceeded to unload my very own personal arsenal and spread it over the ground for all of them to check. "Did I forget anything?"
"Could'a used maybe a few more cases of grenades," the one with the mortar mentioned in something like awe as I returned the stuff to my pack and shouldered it without straining. "Uh, how exactly, do you manage that trick?"
"Dimensional folding," with a shrug, I continued my answer in technical terms and realized that my audience didn't understand word one beyond the dimensional folding part. (And that was kind of an iffy thing.) "It's a spell, that makes something a whole lot bigger inside than it is outside, and pretty well gets rid of all the weight so you can carry it around without staggering."
"Is it permmanent, once you fix the pack, or whatever?" Another one questioned with an avaricious gleam in her eyes.
"It can be, with a small adjustment to the spell and a larger expenditure of power," I responded, then realized I'd been had again. Have you ever imagined a bunch of hardened, veteran Hell Maids giving someone pleading, cow eyed looks? Let me tell you, that's more unnerving than seeing them in full fighting mode.
"All right," with a sigh, I gestured to their own packs, "bring me your pouches, packs or whatever, one at a time, and I'll see what I can do with them."
"I'm Gerta," the lady lugging the mortar supplied as she gingerly handed me her overstuffed backpack. "should I unload it first?"
"Good idea, Gerta. Otherwise the spell might lose something you want to keep."
"Oh, ok," Gerta began pulling out a rather staggering assortment of handguns, a folded up contraption made of chains and sickle shaped blades, and boxes of ammunition for each handgun. I recognized a Glock, a Colt Commander, A Taurus 9mm, and something that looked suspiciously like a hand held Phaser from Star Trek.
Once I'd completed the spell on her pack, Gerta began stuffing everything she had brought, including a very impresive looking assault rifle and the mortar into it with the wide grin of a little girl with a new Barbie case for her dolls. As she crammed the mortar in on top of everything else, I couldn't resist asking. "A mortar?"
"Better to have it and not need it..." Gerta shrugged, then grinned. "I have a howitzer, too, but couldn't figure out how to sneak that into Gehenna."
"I really don't think they'd notice," I answered, wondering what else these ladies had up thier collective sleeves, or stuffed down thier chainmail bras. "But it's always a good idea to keep something in reserve, anyway."
"Good point, little sister," Gerta gave me a companionable, if thundering, clap on the back and I didn't even stagger. Experience had taught me to brace whenever one of my larger sisters (which included every Hell Maid in existence, by the way) thought I had either come up with a good idea or had done something else they approved of. Given the bruises I still get from their approval, I'm just glad they like me.
Once the last pack had been spelled, permanently because I had decided right away the extra use of power would at least save me from doing the same thing over and over, I was ready for a short rest. Unfortunately, Syl and the rest had other ideas.
"Come on Angie!" my former teacher bellowed out cheerfully as she waved the preset wand to open the portal for our journey to Gehenna. "Time's wasting here! We have things to do, troops to inspect, Myrmidons to annoy, and Night Fiends to make fun of! Maybe we'll even find us a good friendly fight or two if we're lucky."
"Oh, boy," I grumbled while moving towards the gate. "How much fun could we have?"
"Quite a bit of it if you aren't as good at sneaking as you and Lor say you can be," Syl grinned. "That's why we brought along all the extra toys and goodies."
"Your confidence in my abilities is both inspiring and heart warming," I grumped.
"Now don't go getting all pouty, little sister," Syl soothed. "We just want to be prepared for any contingency. I'm sure you'll be able to keep yourself hidden from view long enough to find out a few tidbits of information and all that without getting yourself caught. But if you do slip up, at least we'll have the firepower to get you loose. Right?"
"Hell, Syl, you gals have enough firepower with you to equip a small country's army," with a sigh of resigned acceptance, then a wicked grin, I looked up at her, then around at the others. "But I'll do my absolute best to deprive you of all that fun. I do appreciate the idea that you're all prepared to do it to get me out of trouble, though."
"Aw, it would just give us a legit excuse to tear the gonads off some of those fancy smancy Myrmidons," Gerta laughed in response. "And to twist a few arms off those Ninja Wannabe Spider creeps Baal keeps around."
"I have the feeling that we all may be doing some of that anyway," I answered without the enthusiasm of my sisters. "Even if we get out of Gehenna without any problems, those problems are very likely to follow us home and expect to be fed, if you know what I mean."
"That's ok," The mortar toting Hell Maid shrugged. "My howitzer is on wheels and moves real easy."
A Hell Maid with a howitzer... Now there's an image for you. No wonder I couldn't get any tactical nukes. My too enthusiastic sisters would have connived a way to get hold of some, then probably blow the Hell out of Hell with them and wonder why folks got mad about it.
I did mention the little fact that we actually had a plan that didn't involve shooting, cutting, or blowing anything up, didn't I? No? Well we really did, even if it was a bit simplistic. The others were going to strut their stuff, poke thier noses into everything visible, ask a multitude of military questions, inspect Baal's troops, and generally be as obnoxious about it as possible without igniting open hostilities. (Pretty normal behavior between rival bands of fighters in Hell, actually.) All of which was planned to keep the locals busy and scrambling to keep them from finding anything they shouldn't see.
While that was going on, I would be (hopefully) behind the scenes under cover of a whole raft of invisibility and anti detection spells, poking through Baal's headquarters. I had no real idea of what I might find, but was sure there just had to be something interesting and incriminating in there. So, without my armor (safely packed away in my trusty backpack of holding) and wearing some really uncomfortable and noxius booties to muffle my hoofsteps, all I had to do was find the information that would tell Lord Lucifer that Baal really was planning some sort of coup.
Simple. Right? Ohhh, Suuuure. By the way, the plan wasn't mine. In the short time I'd been a minion of Hell, my sweet little ass had been on the line several times, and I wasn't about to go out of my way to devise even more ways to expose it to potential harm. My mamas, either the Human one or the Demonic ones, didn't raise no damned fool. Huh uuhh!
But when Mother Lillith and Lord Lucifer tell just about anyone in Hell that they're going to do something, it generally gets done without argument. So, ok, I argued. For about fifteen seconds. Then started assembling my own arsenal of ordinance and spells for the dangerously idiotic mission they had handed me. Not without more than a few grumbled imprecations, mind you, but I knew better than to press my luck with that pair. Being dead, really dead, does have a few advantages over sulphur pit duty, you know. Not many, but they are there are a few if you look really hard.
Gehenna is an -- interesting -- place. I wouldn't care to call it home myself, too noisy and housekeeping would be a real nightmare. Just ask the condemned souls assigned to clearing up the messes all of Baal's war games leave scattered around if you don't believe me.
The noise level would be unnerving, but the ominous periods of silence between ground shaking booms, screams, shouted war cries, cheers, clash of bladed weapons, staccato bursts of automatic weapons fire, and hiss of flying missiles are even worse. Truthfully, I much prefer Gehenna when it's noisy. At least then you have a pretty good idea of what the denizens of the place are up to.
The entrance we emerged close to was really a pretty mundane looking guardhouse with a prosaic appearing chain link fence to either side that only extended about a hundred yards in either direction, and a standard counterbalanced bar for a gate. That's where the mundane ended and the insanity inducing stuff started, though.
The fence itself was festooned with a haphazard mess of webbing that no self respecting spider would have acknowledged, much less called home. Then there were the things stuck in the stuff. Let's just say that it was apretty wide and wild variety, some of which even looked a bit humanoid. Now that might have made up a tempting buffet table for something lacking in the most basic sense of good taste, and with an appetite that would happily eat anything that didn't eat it; for me it would have been the perfect incentive to diet had that been needed. One look and my appetite would have run with its tail between its legs and not come back for a week.
The road we marched up on was paved in blood red stones that pulsed with some form of life that screamed in agonized rage whenever one was stepped on. Evidently each of the sullen red flags represented one of Lord Baal's victories and held at least one imprisoned soul that had displeased him for one reason or another. I hung back, and off to the side purposefully, so I could activate my masking spells without garnering undue, and very unwelcome, attention.
Why didn't I do that before we left you ask? Simple enough, really though it can be a real pain in the you know what. The portals have this nasty habit of disrupting spells on anyone passing through them. Not negating them, but twisting them into something that wasn't planned for at all and usually ended up as at least a major embarrassment all the way to causing the user of the spell to dissipate into nothing. Painfully.
I know, I know, I'd spelled the packs before we left, and the portal didn't disrupt those. Inanimate objects, you see, aren't affected at all by the effect. Only living (or what passes for that down here) creatures get zapped. I could have hitched a ride inside of someone's pack, I suppose, but just imagine yourself in a place where distance means nothing at all, and dimensions fold back on themselves like a ball of yarn an energetic kitten has gotten its paws on. Oh, yes, I'd have been folded up the same way. Yuck! And thanks for the offer, but I think I'll walk if it's all the same to you.
The gate was manned(?) by several different types of creatures. There were two very imposing and dangerous looking guys in plain but immaculately gleaming armor incongruosly armed with wicked looking assault rifles and carrying sidearms that looked like something out of a bad science fiction movie. No matter how ridiculous those handguns looked, I had no doubts at all as to their effectiveness when in use. The Myrmidons (Baal's elite warriors) watched with detached interest and visible distaste as the others guarding the gate met our little party.
Now those critters were pure nightmare. One good look at them and I understood both the web and the things caught in it. Hideously Skull-like faces with burning red eyes that gave an impression of the ability to see through any kind of murk or darkness, fangs that actually dripped some knd of nasty looking(and smelling) gunk, four spindly but powerful arms, one pair of strong looking legs, and another set of limbs between the lower set of arms and the legs that seemed to have trouble making up their minds whether to be arms or legs. All topped off with unkempt white hair that trailed down their backs like some noxious weed. Night fiends, Baal's attempt to copy the Lillim. I personally thought that he'd really screwed up on that one, but as things were, refrained from commenting.
The Night Fiends were armed with ridiculously baroque weaponry, too. Like swords with overly ornate hilts and guards, etched engravings on everything that depicted things that actually made my skin crawl and my gorge try to rise up right out of my throat and run home all by itself, and their armor... Oh please! That stuff was so ornate, decorated with skulls, arcane symbology, and other almost laughable embellishments that I wondered how the creatures even managed to move without freezing up some joint when they did.
But move they did, with a fluid grace that was impressive of itself, interposing themselves between the party of Hell Maids and the road beyond the gate and assuming poses meant to be threatening and ominous.
Syl, naturally, wasn't at all impressed. She marched right up to one of the nightmares, glared back into its baleful eyes, then let out a disdainful sniff. "You're blocking the road, you poor imitation of a black widow. Would you mind moving?"
"What isss your businesss heeere?" the creature hissed, evidently not impressed by Syl any more than the Hell Maid had been with itself. "Produce authorizzationsss now, or suffer the consequences Milk Maid."
"That's Hell Maid, Ma'am to you," Syl answered with her usual bluff aplomb. "If you really want a little tussle, I can lose the authorization papers for a few minutes. Otherwise, we are here on Lord Lucifer's business, a snap inspection of Lord Baal's readiness in the event of a renewal in hostilities with Heaven, and I would strongly advise you to step aside now and let us pass."
"Paperssss," the Night Fiend demanded while holding out a clawed hand after a few moments of considering the pros and cons of just starting a fight and getting it over with. Evidently the cons won out. I had been told that Night Fiends had a great antipathy for Succubae, especially the Lillim. (There is a difference, really. Lillim actually dwell in Lillith's Home, other Succubae exist, and are generally pledged to some Demon Lord or other. Those are the ones who have repeatedly been too much trouble for Mother Lillith to put up with any longer and had been handed their walking papers.)
I noted that their antipathy seemed to include Hell Maids. Oh, well, the feelings were quite obviously returned in kind. Everyone looked at least a little disappointed when the thing decided to check out the papers authorizing the inspection instead of fighting on the spot.
Once Syl produced the papers (Hell invented red tape, by the way) in the requisite triplicate form, one of the Myrmidons sauntered forward and took them from the Night Fiend without a word. He perused them with deliberate slowness, made a great show of counting heads against the passes listed in the papers, gave the assorted backpacks a look and dismissed them as able to conceal anything too lethal, and waved the party through.
"Everything is in order," he announced with a note of disappointment in his voice as he kept one sheaf of the forms while handing the rest back to Syl. "You ladies watch where you stick your pretty little noses. We play rough and for keeps here in Gehenna. You might get yourselves hurt by accident if you aren't careful."
"Thanks for the concern," Syl answered drily. "Now if you'll tell your spider pets to move, we'll be on our way."
The Night Fiends hissed in anger, but stood aside at a commanding look from the Myrmidon. "Let them pass."
While that little tableau played itself out and ended through sheer boredom, I had been checking out the unseen defenses of the gate to Gehenna. I actually found them to be pretty good, but nothing I couldn't circumvent with a bit of effort, and skirted the fence to quietly wait on the other side for the others to enter Baal's realm.
A patrol of Night Fiends chanced across my path as I moved into Gehenna, and almost seemed to sense my presence. One of them even began snuffling near enough to where I was crouched holding my breath to make me think I'd been had before I even started. The thing was gathering itself for a pounce (or whatever it is Night Fiends do when they attack) and I readied myself for trouble.
Just as I was about to pull Heaven's Bane free of her scabbard and show these ridiculous looking things what a real fighter could do -- in my case holler for help and run for all I was worth -- it leaped past me to grab up some scorpion like creature and stuffed the little critter into its stinking maw. Chewing industriously, the thing walked right past me and resumed its patrol. Snack time in Gehenna. Phew! I made a mental note to never, ever accept a dinner invitation from anyone who lived there.
Syl and company passed through the gateway into Gehenna as I reached the verge of the road they were following and proceeded to a point only a few hundred yards inside. Stopping, they settled down into variously comfortable (?) postures and quietly began poring over maps of the Principality in preparation for their very real tour of inspection for Lord Lucifer. Not that any of that was necessary, they knew perfectly well where they were going and what route had been planned. The pause, I think, was to annoy the hovering escort of Night Fiends more than anything else.
Not that the things didn't look dangerous, they did, and do. In fact, they are -- very dangerous. Capable of shooting out webs to entrap enemies, using a great variety of weapons ( up to six at the smae time - sheesh, I'd think they'd get tangled up in all those elbows ) and rudimetary spell casting, Night Fiends were a pretty nasty package. But put a reasonably competent Lillim, Succubus, or Hell Maid up against half a dozen of them and what do you get? Spider mush, that's what. Baal had created some horrific creatures in them, but they just weren't up to the standards of Home, or The Barracks, where unattached Hell Maids lived. Which is probably one of the reasons Hell Maids delighted in tormenting the things so much. A group of Lillim would have simply lifted their lovely noses and pretended to ignore the damned things.
Anyway, as I was saying, my sisters had already planned out their route and the places they intended to visit. I knew what their itenerary was, even though they weren't too sure of mine. Which made sense when you considered the numbers. Seven of them barrelling over to where I was for help would be not only ludicrous, but totally useless. On the other hand, One of me porting to them if I got into trouble would provide reinforcements for your's truly, add my own considerable firepower to the group's, and give us all a better chance of getting out at least partially intact if real trouble did start.
My aim was to take a slightly meandering path towards Baal's own citadel, then into the place itself if that was feasable once I got there. If not, I was to hang around outside and make careful note of who and what went in or out of the place. Truthfully, I was hoping for the second option, but had this horribly certain sensation in my gut that I would be quite familiar with The Citadel's corridors before much more time had passed.
With a half forlorn wave that none of my sisters sould see, I began my own trek through beautiful Gehenna. Not! I actually floated myself a few feet off the ground (land mines, unexploded shells, and other nasty surprises down there for the unwary) and used my wings as sails to let the prevailing breezes waft me in the direction I wished to go. As for beautiful Gehenna... If you bought that one, have I got a deal for yooouuu."
My journy through Gehenna was... Well, call it interesting. I sure wouldn't want to live there, and no one else sane aside from a junkyard dog would either. The ground was littered with refuse; I mean broken swords, spears, armor, and the occasional pile of bones were the simplest to describe. I wafted my way past disabled tanks, canon of any era you wouuld care to choose, bent magazines and clips, expended shell casings, trenches, barbed wire (some of it electirfied even after who knows how long of disuse) broken fortifications and general signs that I was passing through a war zone. Or at least a place that had seen a lot of nasty fighting in the past and hadn't recovered at all.
I even crossed over several complete, if blasted, cities. What remained of their streets was even more littered than the bleakly sere plains surrounding them. Now I ask you, what kind of idiot would go to the trouble of building a complete city, populating it, then blowing the thing apart? Answer? Just about anyone inhabiting Gehenna. I was just about to reach the vain hope that everyone in the interior of the place had managed to kill each other off when signs of life appeared. Rather abruptly.
In the third ruined city I crossed, one of the choked off streets barely contained a swarming, snarling mass of bodies locked in the throes of killing each other. None of them had weapons other than those improvised from the surrounding debris. I saw crude iron and steel clubs, thrown bricks, chunks of mortar sailing through the air (Several narrowly missed me and I hastily raised a passive shield to keep those from whanging into yours truly, which would have absloutely ruined all of my non-detect and invisibility spells.) but most seemed rather intent on biting, clawing, or just beating their opponents into whatever might pass for submission in Baal's Realm.
That wouldn't have been bad of itself. They were, after all, ignoring me completely. Something I found myself profoundly grateful for upon brief reflection. But there were airborne elements in the brawl. (Come on, no weapons, no discernable tactics, and no leadership adds up to a brawl or riot, not a battle. Right?)
A batwinged (so what's new with that? Think about the answer now. Where are we again? I rest my case.) monstrosity with a head made up mostly of long, dripping teeth and baleful yellow eyes flapped across my path with a number of smaller things that really appeared to be all teeth, wings, and claws harrying it and the very chewed up warrior harnessed to the bigger one's back. That fight was halfway interesting, mostly because it seemed to be headed right for yours truly.
Problem was, the flurry of airborne activity was kind of hard to dodge since it wove a very erratic pattern through the air. One second it was headed right for me and I prepared to dodge one direction, the next it had veered into the direction I had planned on running. As the snarling, hissing mass got closer, I was beginning to worry that I'd find myself in the center of the free for all with nothing to do but blast it so I could get on with what I'd come to do originally.
Fortunately (for me) just as I was preparing a fairly quiet spell to disable some wings that might not have revealed my presence, several of the smaller things latched onto one of the bigger one's wings and started pulling it towards the ground. Letting out a sigh of relief, I didn't bother to watch the frenzied mass crash into the general meelee below as I gave myself a little (okay a big, and in one hell of a hurry kind of big) boost from my wings to clear the area.
After that I skirted (read gave a very wide berth to) any other battles I happened to come across. That was just as well. I saw another between two groups whanging away at each other with bladed weapons supported by archers, the mass of arrows in flight at any one time was nothing short of staggering and I wondered how any of the combatants managed to survive at all. Going through that mess would have been a really bad idea. As it was, I still had to avoid more stray arrows than I care to count even now. In another, one bunch was dug in and defending one of those very prevalent cities, while another was industriously pounding the defenses with artillery. I didn't even get close enough to hear much of that one other than hollow booms and a few shrieks.
Something about the formation of those towns nagged at the back of my mind, nothing really concrete, but the way they were each laid out tickled my sense of danger, and not because of the fighting going on in and around them. I just couldn't quite put a mental finger on what bothered me about them.
Travelling through Gehanna is a real experience, let me tell you. Not something I'd recommend to a tour group of old ladies, but educational. Speaking of travelling through Gehenna...
I did come across one interesting thing that did not involve a pitched battle to navigate past. There was a group of what I first took to be Succubae escorted by about six of Baal's Myrmidons in their plain, but very fuctional armor and weapons at ready. Thinking that Baal or some of his minions had managed to capture some free Succubae, or even some Lillim, I quietly and very carefully moved in for a closer look.
I should have known that it would have taken more than a mere six Myrmidons to contain eight Succubae of any allegiance. The lucious female figures turned out to be Hags covered in full illusion of beauty and desirability spells so thick they were almost cloying to my senses. The Myrmidons weren't so much guards as an escort and there to protect their visitors. Looking past the illusions I even recognized two of the truly ugly and hideous Hags. I didn't know their names, but they had been among the group who had confronted Syl and me at The Gates over possession of the then Ed Hemmings.
Interesting. Now why, I asked myself, would a group of Hags be getting the special guest treatment in Gehenna, even to rating an escort of Baal's favorites in their progress through the principality? I hadn't heard of any buddy, buddy relationship between Baal and Mab, and I was sure that information would have been passed on to me and the others on this errand that now seemed much less something for pure fools as I continued watching the group moving along one of the few good (all right, no road in Gehenna is good, call it decent with only a few potholes and pieces of abandoned machinery to avoid.) roads in Gehenna.
Getting close enough to eavesdrop was pretty much out of the question, and using a spell to hear what was going on among that group was a definite no-no at the time. Hags are magic users of no little skill, and scrying or probing of them with magic would have alerted them to my presence. I filed the information in my brain under the very interesting and possibly dangerous information category with a flag for anyone who had the correct keys to open it up in case something should happen to me on this mission. A possibility that had become more likely as I considered the ramifications of what I had been seeing.
I swooped on ahead of the group to see what, if any destination they had in mind and found the key to the puzzle that had been nagging me about those ruined towns I'd been seeing. This was a pristine (or as close as anyone in Gehenna could make it) town layout that looked more like a huge park than anything else even with the buildings and streets. Great Lucifer! Now I understood what had been nagging me so persistently between my observations and dodging the combatants I had encountered.
The layout I was looking at was a pretty good representation of Home. Not perfect, but close enough to give anyone who hadn't been there at least a fair idea of where things were. I knew better than to get much closer, because I could feel some pretty powerful magical defenses in place to defend the ersatz Home, and it was populated by creatures shaped into fairly accurate copies of Lillim and Hell Maids.
Damn! I was looking at a set for a battle, one that was just for practice but extremely suspicious when one thought for even a moment about what that practice was meant to do. Train Baal's fighters to navigate through Home with the least amount of confusion possible. As I thought about it, other things I had witnessed clicked into place with a force that nearly staggered my flight to the stage of interrupting it entirely. The first town I had passed was a fair, if ruined representation of The Barracks. (Pay attention here, that is where unattached or off duty Hell Maids lived.) I wasn't sure, but the second, the one under artillery siege, could have been a copy of Lucifer's own complex.
Now these could have just been exercises set up to train Baal's warriors against some of the more formidable opposition they could run up against barring actual Angelic Hosts. But the evidence had been so mangled up, even destroyed in the cases of the copied Barracks and Lucifer's complex that proof would be nearly impossible to obtain.
Interestingly enough, as I watched, the figures in the copy of home morphed back to their supposedly original forms and began dismantling the place in a frenzy that was near panic. And not because of my presence, they hadn't noted that, thank whatever gods were looking after me just then, but to get rid of intact evidence in the event that the snap inspection my sisters were performing should happen to come that way. Why else would the inhabitants of Gehenna actually take the trouble to dismantle something by hand (so to speak) when they so delighted in blowing the shit out of them?
Things were definitely becoming more and more ominous as I went. My dilemma at that stage was whether to take off with the information I already had (tenuous as that may be in a Hellish Court) or go on and gather more of the intelligence I had been sent to find.
I reached a compromise of sorts with myself after some worrying over the need for Mother Lillith, Lord Lucifer, and everyone else to be at least warned of my suspicions and the conclusions those had made me reach. I fired off a rather abrubt stream of information aimed for Lorilei with all the stuff I had so far obtained. Then hightailed it out of that particualar part of Gehenna.
A response came to my hurried message to Lorilei. Mind to mind communication among demonkind, and probably Angels, from all that I've heard, is more like an old style telegram sent over a short-burst encrypted comunications stream than anytthing else that comes to mind. Short, succinct, and very hard to either trace or listen in on.
The reply tickled at the fringes of my mind to warn me, then pushed through as I opened the necessary channel to receive it. Message received. Information appreciated and being acted upon. Continue present activities as originally planned. Thanks from M.L. and L.L. Mama pissed, but says to be careful and Victoria is doing fine.
Well, that pretty well took care of one problem. Home, and everyone else had been given advance notice of impending trouble. M.L. obviously stood for Mother Lillith while L.L. was... (Come on, if you haven't been able to figure that one out, you haven't been paying attention here.) Lord Lucifer. The addition of that bit of personal information simply verified that the message was bonafide, in addition to the very distinct mental flavor of Lorilei's twisty little mind. I really don't think anyone could counterfit her convoluted methods of thinking and acting upon those thoughts. But the added part about Victoria made me feel better in more than one way.
So, I abandoned my leisurely examination of the landscape and arrowed straight towards The Citidel itself. Truthfully, I'd already had more than enough fun and wasn't at all looking forward to having any more. But, commands from Lillith and Lucifer are ignored at the ignorer's peril. (Been through that already, haven't we?)
The Citidel was impressive, but what do you expect from the home base of a Prince of Hell? It was an aglommeration of structures sourrounded with a very high, thick wall, all made of gleaming, polished steel. A bit tacky in my opinion, but that's what it was, and it was obviously Lord Baal's choice. So I won't pick on that any longer. Miles of parade grounds surrounded The Citidel, empty at the moment becuase all the troops were off playing their war games. War games that I had a pretty good idea about the purpose of, and what they were practicing for.
Not that the place was deserted. Far from it. There were troops of Baal's elite, the Myrmidons, patrolling the emptied out parade grounds and the base of the massive walls. Given the numbers of those fighter types I could see, I inferred that Baal was at home. Something that was rare, and I swore to myself at the luck I seemed to be having on this mission. Not only had I been at risk from all the idiotic war games and their participants I'd passed on my way there, now I had a Prince of Hell in residence at His own stronghold. A stronghold, I might point out, that I fully intended to infiltrate.
Oh, did I mention that there was a flock of Hags flitting about the parade grounds and the interior of The Citidel? No? Well there were, which brought up a very uncomfortable question. If there were so many Myrmidons and Hags around the place, what was inside? And why were there so many gods be damned Hags there at all?
Answer? If you guessed that Baal had an inportant guest, and that guest was probably the goddess Mab, give yourself fifty points. I don't care what you do with the points, just don't come to me expecting to have them redeemed for anything. But you have them, for what it's worth.
Second question here. What kind of thrice damned fool would try to pry into things even further with the information so far gathered? Answer -- One Hell's Valkryie who knew she was in much deeper than was healthy already. In other words, sweet little me. Not for the first time since my conversion, I wondered why I had been stupid enough to let myself get killed in the first place, or Hadn't tried to escape once I discovered I was in Hell, or run for all I was worth when Lorilie and company had showed up to collect me, or... Oh, never mind, I think you get the idea.
Mouthing a silent prayer, more like a plea, to any god or goddess who cared to listen, for whatever help I might be able to get, I started searching the damned place for a way in that wouldn't set off umpteen million alarms.
It wasn't easy, the pile of metal Baal called home was very well defended from both physical and magical assault. I had to be very careful even with my probes into those defenses, which were so intertwined that tripping one would set off all the others. I did get an irreverent and pretty funny mental picture of some hapless mouse setting the works off by simply trying to get into the food stores the edifice contained. (And why bother with food stores when all the dinizens of Gehenna either got their nourisment in other ways, or needed nothing physically ingested to keep going?)
Once I penetrated the defenses, very carefully and slowly, as previously mentioned, I discovered the why for the food stores. Baal had a lot of Human recruits in residence. Not souls of the dearly departed, mind you, real, living, breathing Humans who all looked to be nasty customers even for most demons. What in (you'll pardon the expression, I'm sure.) The Hell was this guy planning here? A simultaneous assault on both the existing ruling structure in Hell and the Human Realms? It had to be something like that, since no matter how formidable those Humans were individually or as a group, the effect they would have during a battle in Hell could be termed as laughable at best. Down here, they wouldn't be facing individual demons but mobs of them. Up in the Human Realms, though...
Lord Baal had been a god of war in the past, but even for someone with his credentials, this plan was shaping up into something incredibly ambitious. If he was successful, not only would Hell be in his grasp, he would have The Human Realms in the palm of his hand as well. Which would mean Heaven would be very hard pressed to even maintain its own independence let alone contest Hell for anything. Hoo! This was turning into a real mess.
A mess, unfortunately, that I had found myself squarely in the middle of. And one that I just had to find out more about while doing my best to stir up and disrupt for all involved.
Well, no one told me being the very first Hell's Valkyrie was going to be either easy or pleasant all the time. I began to wonder if my sisters had brought in enough firepower. And worried that they might be running headlong into some sort of ambush that would be dismissed as a 'training accident' involving non-participants once it had happened. And I couldn't even send them a heads up type of warning considering where I was at the time. I just hoped Lor or someone had managed to get the message to them.
I gained access to the place through the sewers. Yuck! If you think sewers in The Human Realms are nasty, I'd suggest you take a look at the bowels of Baal's Citidel. You'd change your opinion rapidly, let me tell you. The leavings of domonic types combined with those of the Human occupants, and a lot of other really stomach churning items are not something I choose to describe even now. Let's just say I pitied the monsters who prowled that awful place and leave it at that. And could see why they had such bad dispositions.
I managed to get through that place without touching anything or being touched by anything either. (Thank you gods, thank you.) to emerge in the dungeons and court area. Take it from me, the dungeons weren't much better than the sewers, and the courts were at best, dismal places. I suppose that was all the better for those Baal and his cohorts decided were lacking or had transgressed. But I was quite happy not to be one of the poor souls (literally) on any of those dockets and made an extremely pointed mental note not to get caught and become one of them.
Oh, I started leaving my little surprise packages there. What packages are those you ask? Remember my packing all those satchel charges? Well, they weren't really what one would call conventional satchel charges. The plastic bags I left behind me, with detonators, were filled either with a version of C4 or thermite absolutely guaranteed to ruin anyone's day if set off. Considering where I had left them, that would be Baal, since the charges would completely undermine his precious Citidel if I sent the signal for them to activate.
The next level was marginally better. Courtyards, lower administrative areas, and receiving areas for recruited or co-opted souls are best designed to be not so forbidding while maintaining the inherent threat of being in Hell and subject to worse things than being assigned to Baal's Citidel. As it was there were thousands of weary souls oiling and polising the metal of the fortress to stave off rust and make the place gleam like the well kept monstrosity it was. I left a number of discrete packages there, as well, since the Humans Baal had recruited and brought down to impress were largely quartered in that part of The Citidel. Hey, if things went bad for me, I could at least make things really tough for his planned assault on the Human Realms, right? At least I hoped that would be the case if things went sour. I knew that Humans, no matter how favored by any Prince of Hell, would be vulnerable to that kind of attack.
I won't detail my further progress through The Citidel, other than to say I left enough well concealed charges to blow the place clear to Heaven if I set them off. And fervently wished I had brought more.
My final stop was a series of floors at the top that were inaccessible to anyone without wings or some means to fly. The corridors of that area were filled to near overflowing with senior Myrmidons and Hags. I could tell all the demon types present were the elite of the selected elite from badges, battle scars, and just the pure sense of power permeating those top floors. As a measure of their arrogance in power, the Hags hadn't even bothered to clothe themselves with illusion, and the Myrmidons were not the least bothered, impressed, or worried.
Wow, I was in it now. Making sure my own masking spells were not only intact, but strengthened while adroitly dodging some very clever (but substandard to my experience) search and find spells that would have caught a less experienced mage, I sought for the center of all this active guarding.
And much to my mixed regret and elation, found it.
Getting ready to sneak in, I activated my failsafe device for the event of my capture. Since they would know that I relied on magic, and would likely set things up to prevent my using it, I very fervently hoped they would overlook the purely mundane, flat little box with a single small button in it's center that I had palmed. A classic, dead man's switch. If I released the slight pressure of my palm against that little button, Every charge I had set would go off, and hopefully bring The Citidel down in ruins. Which, I fervently prayed, would give one little and very overmatched Hell's Valkyrie a slim chance to escape with a relatively intact skin.
Drawing in a long, careful breath then letting it out just as slowly (ok, ok, I was stalling. Now tell me you would have blithely snuck into the inner sanctum of one former god who was hosting a former goddess. I might even beleive you.) I very gingerly eased myself through one of the intervening walls and began to take stock of the situation.
Note: Read Part 1 or Part 3 or Part 4 |
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